Hi all:
Romy, my dearest, I am so sorry that we've all left you wondering what happened to the party!
My own world is incredibly busy right now and my beautiful equine pals are in the back seat. Because we have moved and I'm trying to build a whole new world for ourselves, and business, and community, I am not spending much time with them, other than feeding them and being the manure kid mornings and night times. (Because they are together in pasture with wild turkeys and geese and Finn the new dog to keep them company, I don't feel as guilty about not 'working' with them as I have in the past when they were boarded and in small paddocks or stalls...both a blessing and curse, I fear, because it's given me space to not feel like spending focused time with them is as paramount as it was in that situation...and moving from a boarding situation to a home-care situation, my time with them is spent, unfortunately, far too eaten up by maintenance rather than play...)
So I have not had much to report on, I must admit -- we are continuing to rip layers of my sense of competence and 'knowing' about how to engage with them away, and I'm quietly contemplating that, vs. needing to talk about it a lot. Not wanting to talk about it, to be honest -- made the mistake of mentioning it in passing on Facebook, where I have been spending time because of other responsibilities and a new kind of addiction), and got soured on putting anything in front of anyone again for a bit because of some conflict that arose from it. Needing to be in my own head for a while.
I am hoping that with the spring I will have more energy and time to reconnect in a more coherent way with Circe, especially, and step into our next set of adventures. And when we do that, I generally am raring to talk about them! Ad nauseum!
But mostly, this has been a winter of 16 hour work days and the few moments that I do have to share on line I've been doing it in other contexts that are quick dip-in, step-out connections and/or are moving career goals forward. (I'm moderating a forum for a big conference next summer, for example...). So I've not only not had a lot of energy to tell my own stories, I've been holding space for people in other contexts -- online and in community, so I've not had a lot of spare energy to hold people's stories here.
Am feeling out of balance with this, though, and am missing being fed by AND.
Much love to all here. And, in the immortal words of Ahnold, I'll be back!!
Leigh
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"Ours is the portal of hope. Come as you are." -- Rumi
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