Hi Greg and Mrs.Greg and horses,
lovely intro from you.
I think your analysis that Comet is more inclined to hang out with you because you are comfortable or more naturally relaxed when he is near sums it up...to be trusted we must trust, let's face it, trust, partnership, relationship are all things involving consent and agreement from more than one party, trust should not be a unilateral state.
Of course relationships between horse and human, just as with human and human may have to debate from vastly differing view points, either compromise at times or respect the others opinion whilst strongly disagreeing, or how can a marriage or horse partnership endure and flourish through the decades?
I love that the AND forum allows horses expression of opinion as well as respect.
I hope I uphold those principles when dealing with my own horses.
I do sometimes over rule them because I am the adult responsible for their well being, just because they would like to party in the sweetshop of lush pasture when their weight is already toward the top of healthy,means sometimes I say "no" but you can have some wilted nettles. I also know more about traffic on the road and refuse to be persuaded to walk in front of large vehicles to visit pretty fillies on the opposite carriageway.....but I do see their point of view.
In my experience it is not always the horses who have suffered abuse or neglect or even reasonable care but without having had much socialisation, they just all do have individual personalities.
Some are confident and outgoing, others are shy, some just do enjoy a little solitude. Often it is when those book wormish, introverted, self reliant types offer to enter in mutual grooming with a human, that you really can get a tear in the eyes.
I know plenty of humans who can manage okay, have a hard outer shell and a gooey middle, my friend calls them bonbons.
We cannot force ourselves on the "bonbon" it has to soften a little and offer an invitation.
If we have open hearts, open minds and we give our trust in it's truly defined meaning, we are able to receive that back, and when it comes it is magnified as though through multiple mirror images, and when the trust is projected from a horse you are dealing with love in it's purest form on a soul level.
Ecstatic, wow, of course we are. Most humans never experience giving while expecting nothing in return, never know offering for free without negotiation. Sociey promotes management techniques of gaining as much profit for as little input as possible. Horse do not expect me to cook dinner if they mend my car. As a human I might offer a treat for a leg lift or back up, but they, generous souls, will seek me out when I am sat in contemplation and rest a muzzle or leg against me, give honest criticism of me, love me inspite of myself, forgive my mistakes - providing they were deemed truthful, and engage me in living more fully than would be possible without their beautiful perpective of life, the Universe and everything.
My husband, Steve, is not horsey, but shares their qualities, he never reads this forum so I won't embarrass him, but he allows me to spend my time with my horses without making demands, so I try to allow my horses to also be themselves.
I am so lucky to be able to experience total freedom to be me, not judged by age, appearance, efficiency or social status.
I think Josepha has said it is the horses teaching us to be better humans rather than us training our horses how to be horses.
Welcome to you and enjoy.