The Art of Natural Dressage

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PostPosted: Wed Oct 08, 2008 11:16 pm 
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Two bits of advice:

1. Have goals
2. Enjoy the journey

I have heard both phrases and I think that both, in some ways, are true. The trouble comes when we focus too much on one.

We make goals to help us focus. If we don’t have goals, long and short term goals, we can drift about with no idea of where we are or what we want to accomplish. We have to have some thought about what we want or what we want our horse to be. It doesn’t matter what discipline we practice, whether we want to reach the Olympics or just trail ride, we have to have a goal of where we want to be.

We have to enjoy the journey or we will never get to the end. If we don’t enjoy the journey for the journey’s sake, then we have lost sight of what we are doing with our horses. If you can’t run the race and enjoy the running, winning is somewhat hollow. To quote a movie: “If you’re not enough without it, you will never be enough with it.”

We must try to focus on where we are while still keeping the end in sight. We cannot focus all our attention on the present or the end. Neither is complete without the other. While we may never quite reach our goal, we must strive to meet it. If we meet our goal, we must not be satisfied with that; we must reach farther out and strive for even more. It is this striving for our goals that allows us to dream, to imagine, and to try.

We must also keep the present in mind while we are doing all that striving, imagining, and trying. We have to meet our horse where he is and not pressure him to meet our standards or goals. We must help him be the best he can be where he is. The goal is a guide, not a means of force.

I tend to get wrapped up in the goal and what it will be like when we reach that goal. I sometimes miss the very precious time that I have now. I miss the moments that I can spend enjoying my horse just for his sake. In horsemanship, we are striving for a balance between the two, both working hard for something, while still taking time to smell the roses.

Learn to dream and learn to live…


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PostPosted: Thu Oct 09, 2008 6:08 pm 
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I like this, Ivy!

:-)

One of the biggest pieces I've been learning on my own particular journey is how to step back and really look at what my goals are.

I find myself recasting them -- when I started back into horses after a long hiatus five years ago, my goals were pretty concrete, and pretty much about me.

I wanted to find my way back to being a confident, balanced rider. I wanted to master the basic concepts of dressage. I had dreams of mastering more than the basics. I wanted to look and feel good on a horse! I yearned for effortless elegance :-)

Now, the farther I traverse this AND path, I find that how I define my goals is changing.

I want a true sense of partnership and companionship with my horses. I want to learn how to move fluidly with them (both physically and emotionally) so we can find delight in our time together. I want to learn from them as much as I teach them. I want to understand what makes them tick, and by so doing, better understand what makes me tick. I want to be able to play with them -- on the ground and on their backs -- in any context that feels comfortable to us, be it working on collection in the arena or exploring the world on the trails around us. I want us to trust one another.

And, the farther I get into this, the more I realize that these are the things that I've been hungering for with horses since I first started riding as a young child. A lot of them got lost along the way, shaped by the structures and expectations of how the people around me were working with horses. I allowed myself to be pulled away from those deep goals and instead get caught up in the tangible mileposts -- to be able to jump a certain height, or execute a particular dressage movement well, etc.

I still have specific "wouldn't if be cool if" dreams -- to ride Circe in just a cordeo through my valley into town and out into the hills beyond us. Or to have Stardust say finally and forever, it doesn't freak me out to have you get on my back. And these do inform our choices.

But the big ones are the ones that most deeply color what we do! And I've got a sneaking suspicion that if we achieve effortless elegance, it will be because of these goals, not my own earlier self-absorbed ones..

:-)

Best,
Leigh

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PostPosted: Thu Oct 09, 2008 9:03 pm 
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Leigh wrote:
And, the farther I get into this, the more I realize that these are the things that I've been hungering for with horses since I first started riding as a young child. A lot of them got lost along the way, shaped by the structures and expectations of how the people around me were working with horses. I allowed myself to be pulled away from those deep goals and instead get caught up in the tangible mileposts -- to be able to jump a certain height, or execute a particular dressage movement well, etc.


I recognize a lot in that too. Last weekend I bought a set Blacky Beauty, the series dvd's 8) and while watching them and thinking about my childhood love for horses, I realised that our love for horses really gets shaped into accepted molds.

When you ask a child what his dreamhorse would look like, is the answer:
'A horse who is totally obedient and does everything that I ask of him, whenever I ask it'?
Or is it:
'A horse who is enourmously proud, beautiful and strongwilled, with a spirit that can't be broken but who will do anything for the person who lets him be - while still following his own instinct and thoughts when they are wiser (like refusing to cross a bridge that is going to break down, instead of obediently being led away by thieves fight and escape, indeed Blacky Beauty 8) )'?

For me, now I came to think of it, it was never that first horse, but always the second. I didn't want a horse who was totally broken and submissive to my will, but instead a horse with a very strong will who accepted my opinions too - whenever he thought they were wise.

There are very few childrens stories about broken horses. Instead they are all about horses who couldn't be broken and could only be contacted through love as they would always fight injustice. And not just horses: Lassie frequently is a 'bad dog' too, ignoring cues to save people, fending off bandits (Bad dog, Lassie, a good dog should never bite a human! 8) ).

Maybe there are children whose greatest wish is to have a horse who is 100% submissive and does anything every human asks of him without questioning it, but I haven't found it yet, and that might be for a reason. Another thing which is interesting about the childrens stories is that indeed the horse/dog does something weird/bad in the eyes of normal people (refusing to cross the bridge, growling at the future bad guy) and other people (usually the adults 8) ) get angry with them for that - and then at the end it turns out that the animal had a very good reason for that refusal or seemingly bad behavior. Too bad we never took that morale out of the childrens stories and realised how true that is whenever working with animals, whenever they refuse to blindly follow our cues. They always have a reason to do so, one that is good enough for them to choose for that behavior. :)

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PostPosted: Fri Oct 10, 2008 2:39 am 
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Oh, Miriam, that was a beautiful, beautiful post... Thank you.

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PostPosted: Fri Oct 10, 2008 2:50 am 
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When I was a bout fourteen or so, I came across a poem. I can't remember most of it. Only the last line. And I've googled, and googled, but I can't find it anywhere.

It's about arriving at goals..or more to the point, NOT arriving at goals. I do have goals I suppose, but the journey itself is so much more important to me that reaching an end is almost too difficult to imagine. I don't want to be there.

Where is "there"? Well, like Leigh I suppose, being able to ride cross country...just my horse and I. In perfect balance, in perfect happiness. Doubt very much if I will get there, and honestly I don't care if I do.

The last line of the poem was...

..."May you always strive, may you never arrive."


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PostPosted: Fri Oct 10, 2008 10:11 am 
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What a beautiful poem!

I like it very much indeed too.I do have goals too when playing with the ponies, but since I've been doing AND, the way I see those goals and the way they influence our training has changed a lot. In the past (classical dressage and NHE) I always came to the paddock with the idea, 'today I'm going to train shoulder in and get it better than yesterday'. Which is very logical, because I still had all the tools (cordeo, whip, lines etc) with which I could make that happen, whatever the pony thought about it. 8)

When I tossed all that away though, it really left me with nothing to chase my goals with, and that really was a turning point in my brain. Because now I could do nothing more than letting go, live in the now and work with what's offered.

I still do have goals, but they are more like 'I would love to do a travers in trot one day', and I do things that could lead to that when it all clicks together in the ponies mind, but I don't really work towards that goal anymore. There's no timeframe, and these goals are more like visualisations of what I would love to see one day, than things that really structure our training sessions.

So I still have goals I think, but they've stopped taking over my life with the ponies. :)

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PostPosted: Fri Oct 10, 2008 12:06 pm 
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ivyschex wrote:
We have to have some thought about what we want or what we want our horse to be.


Thanx Ivy :)

My goal is for my horses to be all they can be:
Equus Univeralis.

In practise that means I want to help my horses finding and achieving their goals.

In return, they do the same for me, helping me achieving homo universalis 8)
so every day, we seize the day :D

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PostPosted: Fri Oct 10, 2008 3:45 pm 
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Thank you everyone for your beautiful responses. It is very nice to hear what everyone thinks about this. I know that for myself, I was (perhaps still am) too focus on the end result. That does put lots of pressure on both me and my horse to be something that we are not.

I do hope that this can help people who don't know, understand about horses.

Ivy

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PostPosted: Fri Oct 10, 2008 3:48 pm 
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ivyschex wrote:

I do hope that this can help people who don't know, understand about horses.

Ivy


or themselves ;)
Like I once... oh dear :lol:
But I am getting better 8) :lol:

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PostPosted: Fri Oct 10, 2008 3:59 pm 
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[quote="Josephaor themselves ;)
Like I once... oh dear :lol:
But I am getting better 8) :lol:[/quote]

Doesn't that hold true for us all? I continually find myself going back to old methods and being harsher than I should. As someone once said: Natural Horsemanship is anything but natural for human beings. We are predators, made to attack and dominate. We must learn then to communicate with the prey animals such that they don't see us as predators anymore.

Ivy

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PostPosted: Fri Oct 10, 2008 4:14 pm 
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sure it is :)

Well, I totally have to disagree with being a predator though... :D

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PostPosted: Fri Oct 10, 2008 6:19 pm 
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From Carolyn Resnick's blog this morning, from radio interview audio clip:

"You should give up your agenda if you want to reach the true mind."

http://www.carolynresnickblog.com/blogtalk2.mp3

Some nice thoughts from her, also, at the top of the clip, about her horse Cat and how being loved for who he is and what he wants has opened him up.

:-)
Leigh

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PostPosted: Mon Oct 13, 2008 6:24 pm 
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Hi Everyone,

This was a really helpful thread to read all the input on as I have been pondering these goal oriented thoughts and desires I've had with the horses lately. I was feeling that my dream "riding across the open field, by a stream...on a horse that wants so to be with me and is happy to follow my lead".. was so unreachable. I liked your quote Leigh....'wouldn't it be really cool if'.... I think that these goals and dreams are great and are wonderful virtual realities to visit in our minds as... amazingly as we hold these dreams with all the good feelings they produce in us....the cosmic mind (God) will surely in it's (his/her) desire for expansion..fulfill them. And the AND site has helped me to recognize that not only do I have to be happy in the journey but my horse too. So now my dream is coming to life. Does anyone read Abraham-Hicks materials...seen The Secret film? I just finished reading Ask and It Is Given by Esther and Jerry Hicks.

If I had to summarize the teachings of Abraham it would be: Hold the Vision, Feel the Vision, Keep the Faith and Be Happy... and it will surely come to be. I always feel the best when playing with this if I allow time to be endless and be detached from the time frame (even to the point of thinking well...maybe next life!) and just enjoy my dreams in virtual reality to the max. As that will draw it to me according to Abraham.... The Law of Attraction. NHE and Hempfling are cool videos too to feed the virtual dream. I feel like this AND site is one really important "how to" thread of bringing my dream to manifestation. So cool 8) 8) 8)

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PostPosted: Mon Oct 13, 2008 8:25 pm 
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Oh, Patrice there is your dream again. It was your dream-post in the riding topic in NHE where you first came to my attention almost exactly one year ago and I PMed you, but before I got the chance to read your reply I was already banned. :lol: Such a pity that I never got the chance to read the replies to you in that topic, but I am sure they were nice and constructive? :twisted: :wink:

So our email contact started with that dream and now, one year later, I hope you have found a place where you feel that people are more willing to help you and encourage you on your way to make that dream come true. :)

For me personally it´s a bit hard to consciously realize what my goal is, so I actually have too little of what some more goal-oriented people have too much. I guess I want my horses and myself to be happy, but that´s almost as precise as I can get it. :oops: I have never had very clear visions of the future - not only for horses but in every area of my life. I know what I want to be and do NOW, but it´s hard for me to anticipate things in the future and work towards something. It becomes especially obvious for me when some of those small things happen where you can have a wish (like when a falling star comes down, when you lose an eyelash or find a four-leaved clover leaf), because then all that comes to my mind is always something like "I want everything to remain as nice as it is" or sometimes I am sending my wishes away to someone else, because I just can´t think of anything that I want and don´t already have. :oops:

Fortunately what I want and have for now is mostly also what successfully brings me to the next step, so I am getting along well. But still I wish that I could be a bit more goal-oriented sometimes. But maybe it will change when I will grow up (that´s what people always responded to that in my youth). :)


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PostPosted: Mon Oct 13, 2008 8:54 pm 
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I'm also quite bad at those wish-situations! :D

In the past I had all these big wishes/active goals (Blacky doing passage, getting a great job, publishing the trick training book etc. etc.), and now I actually only have one more wish left (well, except for a small cottage with a 2 acre field near my job in Utrecht, which is quite impossible 8) ), and that is more time to enjoy all the things that I experience now. :)

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